If it’s not written down it doesn’t exist on my schedule


 This was my breakfast scene. While Wonder Boy splashed around n the cup of water I poured for him to accompany his toast with peanut butter, I scarfed down my own toast and drank coffee while starting my online to-do list for the day.

That is my favorite coffee mug. It’s a Disneyland one. And that is a Fiestaware plate. My favorite color, of course.

I loved putting together my binder every August for the upcoming school year, tucking in classroom rules in the folders and putting new pencils in the pouch.

That small tidbit of organization never lasted long. Papers would fly out of my notebook. My agenda had blank pages because I wasn’t filling it out in class. Assignments almost forgotten, buried beneath pages of notes from English. Pencils lost at the bottom of the backpack next to a tampon and piece of gum.

The life I’m creating, one where I have a voice, is a complicated maze for me to negotiate.

One that has to be planned ahead, scheduled. Juggling three lives and an online presence no longer fits into my brain alone.

I downloaded the MyAgenda page from MomAgenda in an effort to try, for a week, to have one place where I could find it all.

Monday and Tuesday went well, but by yesterday I realized, in my satisfaction that stuff on the page was mostly getting done, there was so much NOT on the page that needed to be on there.

Stuff like cleaning, getting outdoors with the toddler and not shopping-for-houses-online-and-falling-in-love-and-getting-my-heart-broken-in-five-minutes. That happened again last night.

On the other hand, dinner has been actually planned every night this week, much better than last week, where more than once I saw it was 4 p.m. and panicked because there was nothing that constituted a meal all three of us could eat.

So day by day, I’m trying to figure out where everything fits in my schedule. And every day, something else slips out of the binder because I spent a little too much time doing something else or getting lost reading blogs (I’m never caught up in my Google Reader.)

And if I ever get my iPad, I know an app to download!