Back to work

 

Today was a flurry of mini errands as I tried to gather everything together for a new tomorrow. Freezing blueberries for muffins when the oven is finally fixed, rearranging the pantry so snack foods are more easily found for snacktime, my first lunch packed to eat without the boys pawing over my food.

blueberries

My first day at work outside the home, somewhere I haven’t been in over five years.

Tomorrow I will be donning a hair net and scooping salad, relieved to find a job close enough and with varied- enough hours I can hopefully balance care of the boys between myself, my husband and the grandmas.

And the writing.

I’ve collected some work to do, late at night, at naptime, sandwiched in between all of the other things in my life. I marvel at my ability to organize this at all, since I am the one full of good intentions but with half-finished organization projects and full Pinterest board of things pinned and forgotten.

The last few days have been both a flurry of activity, bouncing from errand to errand and house project to paperwork and back to dishes, all the while making it a fun weekend for my boys.  One that was a little more spontaneous, one with a little of ‘yes, you can have that treat’  to ‘ sure, we can stay longer’.

The last few months have created a need for a different path in my life. A few years ago, when cooler heads were losing it all, we somehow managed to not only survive but thrive a bit more, purchasing a house at just the right time and expanding our family.

It’s such a relief to have a plan after months of grabbing blind with my eyes closed, to have an idea of where I could go laid before me.

However, I am holding a blank canvas and drawing the map as I go.

I have goal, I have a dream. I have a short-term plan and a longer -term hope.

I have two boys who need this more than their mommy home. My first loves adventure and fun, and the baby, who is finally looking wistfully at grandmothers as they walk off down the sidewalk.

They’re ready for a summer of fun, and I am ready for a summer of work.